you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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