we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize