You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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