Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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