Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i just made my gag reflex go away.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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