don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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