I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
True strength comes from lack of pants
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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