He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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