It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
