Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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