These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
