Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
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