I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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