so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
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a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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