I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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