i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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