Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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