I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Randomize
