my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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