She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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