a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
