My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
