Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Randomize
