This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
