Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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