I like to think it a success when the cops are called
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
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i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
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