U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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