Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
