we have pet lesbian snakes
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
time to smoke my breakfast
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize