She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize