she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Panties = found
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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