Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize