Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
