bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
