whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize