Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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