The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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