We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
