shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize