What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize