So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
You're like the curious george of whores
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize