Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
