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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me

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• (585): View more from New York

  are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (915): View more from Texas

  Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....

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• (512): View more from Texas

  At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..

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• (985): View more from Louisiana

  My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.

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• (941): View more from Florida

  Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!

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• (204): View more from Manitoba

  Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later

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