That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
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Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
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