Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
i need some magic done to my vagina
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
