All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
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