The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize