Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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