she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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