we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I just want nice things and good sex
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Terrible idea I love it