do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
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my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
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WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
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